Passive-Aggressive Fat Shaming

Trolls, yeah, hate them.  We all know the trolls who gallivant all over Facebook fitness pages and blogs, spew their venom, ignite social media fights, insult and agitate ... yeah, they're easy to spot.  They are ugly. They are so very easy to see coming.  Their fat shaming tactics are rather obvious and simple to ignore, because you know that their motive is ill-guided and that their attacks are not really personal towards you anyway, it's just grandstanding looking for attention.  You can keep your guard up with trolls, because they are so obvious.

But what about the attacks to your self-esteem that are not so obvious?  The countless images you see day in and day out that subtly suggest you are not quite perfect.  The headless women with abs of steel with text that indicates if you just tried a little harder, maybe you'd look like that.  They don't come out and say anything is wrong with you - - they leave you to draw your own conclusion.   But human nature tends to compare.  Why do I have cellulite and she doesn't?  When will I ever have a thigh gap?  Why won't my abs cooperate?  Well it must be because my diet isn't clean enough, or I don't work out long enough or hard enough - or simply - I am not enough.   I dare you to stop comparing yourself to others, especially strangers and photo-shopped models ... and START comparing yourself to the only person that matters anyway - YOU!

I hate tag lines like 'go hard or go home'.  You know what, sometimes showing up is half the battle.  I'd hate for someone to skip a fun class or bypass the gym simply because they didn't have it in them to hit it hard. Sometimes, we just need to put one front in front of the other, sometimes we just need to show up.

Guard your eyes, guard your ears and protect your self-worth.  Subscribe to media that encourages and motivates; not humiliates.

Be careful who you let into your psyche.  Trolls are easy to evict, ban and block.  But what about your 'Best Facebook Friend' or 'Favorite Blogger' who continuously posts unrealistic pictures, tag lines and images of bodies that very few can achieve.  Their intent may not be ill, but the passive-aggressive fat shaming can still have damaging effects.

Stand your ground, clean up your diet in more ways than one.   Not all trolls are ugly.

As always, make champion choices,
Debra

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Are you a vacationer, prisoner or a sponge?

Alright people - I'm not usually one for labels, but let's give this one a try, okay? With regard to how you are living your life: Are you a vacationer, prisoner or a sponge? 

(1) If you're a vacationer, you are happily going through life without a care in the world, always out for a good time, lookin' for the party. The problem is, you're not taking responsibility for anything either, after all, you're on vacation. Not worried about responsibility for your community, your body, your health, your family, your job, nothin'! This may be all fun and games in the moment, but as you probably already know, it will eventually catch up with you, and you really will WISH you had taken more responsibility for the things that matter. 

(2) If you're a prisoner, you are living your life in hell, within your own prison, that you have created with walls and bars, because you are punishing yourself ... for what? I have no idea, God only knows - - but you are perpetually and continuously living out a punishment, that is self-inflicted, serving a life sentence. The good news is - there is hope for parole. The only catch is that you are not only a prisoner, you are also the jailer .. and the only one who can set you free is YOURSELF. Break free from these limiting walls you've put up in your life, stop punishing yourself, before the life sentence becomes a death sentence. 

(3) If you're a sponge ... you are soaking it all in. You are embracing life and enjoying the journey, cherishing the moments, learning lessons, and expanding to be better with every ounce of tears shed or laughter emitted. You are taking responsibility for the things you know you should; and you are not in anybody's prison, especially not your own. Soak it up baby ... life was meant to be devoured. 

So do tell - are you a vacationer, a prisoner or a sponge? If you don't like your answer. Change it. 
 

As always, make champion choices, 
Debra 

Calorie Counting

Do You Try To Control Every Calorie?

I struggle with this because I believe tracking my food helps me greatly with accountability to myself and makes it more 'real' what I am putting in my mouth.

But a famous health coach says that one of the things she used to be so guilty of was trying to control every calorie she ate. She'd give herself certain food rules she had to follow (such as no eating after 7 PM, no eating fat, no eating out, no eating certain types of foods, no eating after she ate 1200 calories for the day, etc.). She says what she didn't realize is that when you focus on what you CAN'T do...it makes you want to do it MORE (by the way...this is a human psychology thing, NOT a willpower or self-control thing).

She believes that success lies in focusing on what you CAN do, not what you cannot. It makes you feel empowered and liberated (as opposed to deprived...as we are accustom to feeling when it comes to our weight loss plans). The truth is, eating out or eating after 7 PM isn't our problem...it's what we do when we feel deprived and restricted on our plans.

Me personally, I find this somewhat true.  I know so many people who say that It is during the times we feel deprived and restricted that we binge, decide that all this work isn't worth it, and throw in the towel. The key to weight loss success is avoiding all that, therefore the real key to long-term results on your weight loss plan is to avoid feeling deprived and restricted. What’s ironic is that most programs out there make you feel deprived and restricted, so much so that we’ve literally come to expect it. We’ve trained ourselves to believe that losing weight has to be hard. We feel like if we aren’t busting our butts and stressing ourselves out…we aren’t going to ever see results. And that is EXACTLY why hardly anyone is able to lose weight and keep it off in the long-term. According to her that is.

I know for me (Debra here) ... that if I say I need 7 servings of fruits/veggies, that makes less room for other junk.  If I have to have 64 ounces of water, there is less room for soda. You get the idea.  Focus on what you SHOULD have and CAN have, and not so much of what is a no-no food.  I don't believe in assigning emotions to food or qualities like 'allowed' or 'not allowed'.  I don't eliminate entire food groups just for the sake of doing so.  I'm not Vegan or Paleo or Gluten Free or Pescatarian or anything else... I am just me ... someone who pays attention to how food makes her feel and makes choices based on that information.   And as for me, I am still going to track.  I don't leave my bank account up to chance, I track what I spend so I can see the big picture and know what is going on.  Same is true for my diet.  Even though I hate that word diet.  Really, it's just what we eat.  Truth of the matter is - everybody is on a dang diet because everybody eats.  If not, you're dead.

~SO HERE IS A JOURNAL PROMPT~  {Yes, I highly encourage journaling, as well as tracking}
In the past, have you tried to control every calorie you consumed? Do you give yourself certain food rules you had to follow? What ended up happening when you did? Do you feel like losing weight HAS to be hard? Where do you think this idea came from? How do you think it is impacting your ability to lose weight? How could you start letting go of this belief? Why do YOU think no one is able to keep weight off in the long-term? Have you noticed that when you focus on what you CAN'T do...you just want to do it even more? How has focusing on what you can't do impacted your goal of losing weight? What do you usually do when you feel deprived and restricted? Do you binge? Throw in the towel? Feel like all this work isn't worth it? What would it look like if you stopped focusing on restricting yourself and started focusing on all the healthy choices you have? How would would focusing on what you CAN do make you feel? How do you think it would relieve those feelings of deprivation? What are some things you could infuse into your plan today that would make you feel more empowered and free (as opposed to deprived and restricted)?

As always, make champion choices,
Debra

Adapted from source: Lauren Wardell

Housewifery

Confession:  I suck at housewifery.  Yes, I totally made up that word.  How is it possible that I was once able to run an entire organization, write training manuals and teach database design... yet I cannot seem to keep up with laundry?  I'd blame it on the four children that have invaded my brain power, but honestly, I sucked at laundry before I ever had kids.

Suzie Homemaker I am not.  Betty Crocker, not even close.  I can read. I can follow instructions. Therefore, I can follow a recipe and usually produce something edible, but it is usually out of necessity, not pleasure.  I will never be one of those folks who make up decadent dishes and experiment in the kitchen and cherish the thought of home-made pies.  Yeah, not me at all.  Buy me some pumpkin bread from Starbucks and I am thrilled.  We can bond over a little green straw in my frappe.

I also believe that Pinterest is going to be the death of me. I see all those amazing photos of clever moms with their perfectly orchestrated lunches with properly balanced nutrition .... and here I am jumping up and down because I actually remembered to put money on their cafeteria accounts.  I see images of organized closets and cute book shelves, and back pack areas neatly planned for shoes and what not.  Here I am thrilled if the door to the coat/shoe closet is actually closed.

I actually do have a job:  a part-time job I work from home.  I work for a non-profit organization dealing with foreign exchange students.  The pay is minimal, but it keeps me from focusing on dust bunnies and beds that should be made.  It gives me flexibility, which when all is said and done, is what I need.  Not flexibility to do morning yoga poses (although I probably should) ... but flexibility to be the one who sits in the carpool lane and picks up my fabulous children from their elementary school.  ALL three of them.  It also gives me the flexibility to homeschool my teenage daughter ... because public school would be the death of her spirit for sure.

So, while I may suck at housewifery, I love the mom part of it all.  I love hearing about their day, stressin' over homework and teaching Algebra.  Well, not really, but let's just pretend that part is true. I love playing with my kids, and exercising with them and wearing them out.  I love putting them to bed at night and praying for them constantly. I don't scrapbook very well, but I do silly and fun like a genius. I get in the water. I go down the slide. I go tubing in the river. I laugh at their jokes and gush at their art. I may suck at finding all the Chess pieces, but I am great at finding TIME.  I may suck at making pancakes, but I am great at making mini-van memories. I never went to nursing school but I can kiss a boo boo with the best of them.  I'll never be the crafty super mom who plans meals a month in advance, but I'll definitely make sure they don't starve to death.

So if you come over to my house and step on a Lego, please don't sue me.  I'll pay for you to get a foot massage and buy you a Starbucks.  And as we open our little green straws ... I'll smile and giggle about how much I love being a mom.

As Always, Make Champion Choices,
Debra

Confessions of a Freaky Eater

So I have not been the best blogger.  Inspiration hits, and then it doesn't.  But I am busy raising kids and enjoying life.  I have something most people would call [Selective Eating Disorder] and joined a great group of folks on FB that share a similar fate.   I'm working on it, little by little.  I can try a few things here and there, whereas I never would before.  I now eat scrambled eggs, yay me!  I've also added some fruits to my diet.  Still working on the veggies, kinda, really, not so much honestly - - lol !  God bless Smoothies, that's all I can say :)

Here is a poem I wrote a long time ago that kind of talks about how I am ... thought I'd share.  It just makes me so happy that I have found other people out there in the world, all shapes and sizes and walks of life, that are kind  of like me.

Here is a poem I wrote a long time ago, I've actually made progress since then (a little), but thought maybe some can relate ...

Confessions of a Freaky Eater

Take a peek-a-boo glance, into the interesting life …
Of a picky-eating mom and happily married wife.
I refuse to be ashamed, of the way that I am …
and why do you care - if I love jelly, but not jam.

I adore peanut butter, and I eat a ton of nuts …
but can't stand veggies, no if's – and's – or butts.
I'm a chicken finger fool, as long as they're fried -
but you better not spill any sauces on the side!

Tomatoes are forbidden, yet somehow I like chili –
& I know other folks, just think that's really silly.
Hamburgers are okay – if plain and totally dry …
& DON'T scrape off the cheese – just don't even try!

I do love my oatmeal – and can enjoy tuna fish -
but of course, never together, not in the same dish.
My drinks must have ice, but no lemon in my tea -
& even though, I love the smell –
I cannot stand black coffee.

I hate pasta and rice – & like very little bread,
and truth be told – I prefer plain pancakes instead.
I hate the smell of eggs, but can eat French Toast…
and since I hate to cook, I am not the best host.

I never dine on Pizza – or Italian food of any kind …
I never eat Chinese; the smell alone, makes me blind.
Forget about Mexican; those rice and beans are gross!
No chips or salsa for me,
not even the smallest dose.

No salads for this lady. No casseroles – no quiche.
And if I say " no thanks"; I really mean it – SHEESH!
Now I do love bananas, and apples and oranges too -
and I might eat some grapes, but only just a few.

Now this is just a "taste"; or a sample of who I am;
a gal who hates hot dogs – but doesn't mind spam.
If you understand me,GREAT,but if you don't, oh well!
I just pray you're never plagued ...
-- - with such sensitivity
to texture & smell.

Written by: Debra Sue Higginbotham

As always, make champion choices,
Debra Sue

News to my ears...

I saw this posted as someone's status on Facebook. It spoke volumes to me. 

You don’t have to be flexible. You don’t have to be able to put your foot behind your head or even touch your toes. You don’t have to be able to hold yourself up on your hands upside down. You don’t have to commit hours every day in silent devotion. You don’t have to do anything, except be yourself. If you can breathe, you can practice yoga, and you can gain the benefits of a strong capable body, calm and focused mind, and be ridiculously happy. The more you practice the better you feel! 

Yes, it is high time this mama found herself a new yoga class to try. 
 

As always, make champion chioces, 
Debra

Oh to be a Yogi

So who are my yogi yoga buddies? Who loves Yoga? Who does it and has success with it. I've tried it a few times, with no success at all. One time I tried a HOT Yoga class and nearly passed out from the heat. Another class had so much up and down and up and down from the floor to standing, that I got dizzy and felt ridiculous. I've often said I think I'm too fluffy for yoga, lol. 

However; I just spent a ridiculous amount of time on Pinterest and found all sorts of yoga articles and how they claim that various yoga poses can solve a myriad of problems from stress, to anger, to depression, to weight loss, to skin problems ... they even had yoga solutions for growing longer hair and glowing skin. Some that peaked my interest were those that claim to help alleviate lower back pain, neck pain and migraines. So is this all hogwash hooey or is there some validity to it? 

I am so uncoordinated, and still fluffy, not too sure I'm yoga material ... but that is probably just my insecurity showing colors. 

I think I am going to investigate this further and try out some different yoga classes. In case anyone is interested, here is a link to my Yoga board on Pinterest. pinterest.com/sixtytoefamily/yoga/ 

I would love thoughts and input! 
 

As always, make champion choices, 
Debra

An AHA Moment?

Do you know anybody who is in perpetual waiting mode?  Waiting for some big AHA moment to shake them to their core so that they suddenly jump into active motion and do something about the things that they know they should be doing something about?  Waiting for Monday ... I'll start again on Monday ... I'll start again when school is out ... I'll start again when school is back in session .. I'll start again on my birthday ... I'll start again on New Year's Day ... oh crap, I ate a cookie, now I have to start again on Monday ... might as well eat a whole pie since I'm starting over anyway .... well guess what ... sometimes you have to FAKE IT.

Yep, sometimes you have to fake it til ya make it.  Stop starting over.  Stop waiting for some big monumental event to make you realize what you already know.   Life is full of excuses and obstacles.  There is pain and disappointment and kids and life and husbands and jobs and money problems and grumpy friends and people who let us down and interruptions and everything else.  Fall down 7 times, get up 8.

Stop waiting for an AHA moment.  Make your own.

As always, make champion choices,
Debra

Liebster Award

Well, apparently I've been given the Liebster Award.  If you don't know what that is, don't feel bad, I had not a clue.

"Liebster" is German for "dearest" and it's a blogger to blogger award for those having 200 or fewer followers/members, so they can get more exposure. Well, I'm ALL for spreading the love, so -- it is with blushing cheeks and humble gratitude, that I happily accept.  SO a big fat Thank you to Patsy from http://myarmsopenwide.blogspot.com/ for the great honor.  Smooches to you my friend.

Of course, there are rules, gotta love rules:

1. Thank your Liebster Blog Award presenter on your blog.
2. Link back to the blogger who presented the award to you.
3. Copy and paste the award on your blog.
4. Present the Liebster Blog Award to 11 blogs of 200 followers or less, who you feel deserve to be noticed, and leave a comment on their blog letting them know they have been nominated.
5. Answer the 11 questions the blogger presented you with, create 11 questions for the blogs you are nominating, and list 11 facts about yourself.

The Obligatory Questions I Must Answer:

1. Why did you start your blog?   I want to share my journey and hopefully provide some insight and motivation along the way.  I've learned a lot through self-study and personal success, and if I can save someone else a bit of stress or information overload, then that's even better.

2. Where do you see yourself in 10 years?  I hate this question.  Sorry, Patsy... I love you dearly, but I hate this question.  I have no idea.  This would require planning, and I am terrible at that, lol.  I'm the spontaneous girl dreamer with my head in the clouds.   I hope to have finished my bach. degree in 10 years and have my personal trainer certification completed.  I also hope some of my children have flown the coop by then. LOL

3. Would you support me in my endeavor to be Queen of our country?  Absolutely.  It's nice to have connections ya know.

4. What is your dream that you're afraid to talk about but secretly think about all the time?  It's not a secret, but it is my dream to be a published author.  I don't really have any secret dreams, and any that may qualify would affect the nature of this blog and hurl it into an entirely different audience and category, tee hee.

5. Of course, because I love to read, what's your favorite book?  Can I choose the easy way out and say 'The Bible'?   No, I didn't think so.  I'm in the midst of chaos and raising 4 lovely children right now, that is the season of my life, and I fear I do not read quite the way I wish I could.  If it's not Oxygen magazine or New Rules for Lifting for Women, I'm not sure.  You know what, I'm sticking with 'The Bible' ... you can't go wrong with that one.

6. If you had total control of the world, what are 3 things that you would do immediately, aside from crowning me Queen?   (1)  Crown Patsy Queen.   (2)  Eliminate persecution of Christians.  (3)  Create universal money. (4) Find a book to read.

7. What is one goal that you achieved that you are most proud of (not counting family)?  I lost over 100 pounds.  Well, I don't like to say I lost them, let's say I released them. 

8. What are you working hardest at right now?  Does raising children count?  Well aside from that, working hard on getting some medical mysteries of mine figured out and continuing on my health journey.

9. What is the most hilarious thing that has ever happened to you?  My whole life is a comedy act it seems.  Hard to pick one thing.  My wedding was pretty hilarious.  Groom/hubby lost his glasses, I had to drive, we had a flat tire, we got lost in a graveyard in the rain trying to put flowers from my wedding on my mother's grave.  Yeah, things like that happen to me all the time, lol.

10. Finish this sentence: In 2013, I will _____________________.  I will finish my personal trainer certification.

11. They're making a movie about your life. Who would  you choose to play your part?  Meryl Streep of course.  Is there any other choice?  I think not.


The Obligatory 11 Facts I Must Provide:

1. I use to work for the FBI.
2. I love lima beans.
3. I hate pizza.
4. I collect watches.
5. I wear mis-matched socks on purpose.
6. I love bridges.
7. I've driven across the USA twice (coast to coast)
8. I can pinch you with my toes like nobody's business.
9. I've been married for 20 years to the same glorious man.
10. I have four children, but have hosted dozens of foreign exchange students and foster children over the years.  Right now we are hosting a girl from Taiwan.
11. Two of my children were spontaneously born on holidays (Halloween and Valentine's Day)

The Questions My Nominees Must Answer: 

1. Why did you start your blog?
2.  Do you have a target audience for your blog?
3. What is your overall message you want the world to hear?
4.  What do you do about haters?
5.  Do you have a Facebook Page, if so, what is it?
6.  Who would you just LOVE to interview and blog about?
7.  If you could have a celebrity endorse your blog for free, who would you pick?
8.  Who are your heroes?
9.  What is your guilty pleasure?
10. If you could have an all-expense paid convention for all of your blog followers, where would it be?
11. Would you consider writing a book based on your blog?


Now the moment you've been waiting for (well, maybe) ... my 11 nominees for this very prestigious award ... drum roll please ... and they are:


1.  The Chicken Scoop
2.  Tri To Be Fit
3.  Living The Fit Life
4.  Fabulous Fitness
5.  Dimples Does It
6.  It All Makes a Difference
7.  Living Life in Louie
8.  Chell's Journey
9.  Girls Gone Healthy
10. Eat Good 4 Life
11.  Fit for Faith

Check out their blogs, and tell them Healthy Habit Girl sent you.  Enjoy.

Start by Eating !

Healthy Habit Girl's latest creation ... enjoy !

You must eat this, don't eat that .. too many carbs, but not enough fat.
Try this superfood, juice for your life ... cook all meals, like a good little wife.

Cardio is the answer, weights are the key ... eat six meals, no wait, only three.
Running is great, but not for you ... now go for intervals, in all that you do.

What is your heart rate, what is your pace?  I'd rather walk, then join a race.
Hows your cholesterol? How's your BP?  Now go tell me, the color of your pee.

Drink your water, but not too much.  Eat your veggies and fruits and such.
Avoid all soda, you know it's so bad... and sugar explains every ill you've had.

Gluten is the devil, or is it just wheat?  Now count those calories and all that you eat.
Salt is horrible - but sea salt is great?  Which leads to a whole other lively debate.

You're eating too much!  You don't eat enough!  And aim for abs, to be totally buff.
Skinny is now out, Curves are now in.  Do you eat for health or starve to be thin?

Do you follow the crowd, or lead the way? Or, do you just follow the diet of the day?
Do you read so much, you just get stuck?  Analysis Paralysis just breeds the bad luck.

Do something, or anything, but move your feet.  And by all means, if you're hungry, EAT!
Willpower is overrated. Motivation is fleeting.  If you want to lose weight, start by eating!

As always, make champion choices,
Debra